Dear Brennan,

You woke up from your nap this afternoon smiling. I scooped you up and held you close to my chest and you rested your head on my shoulder. I nearly cried. I thought to myself that it won't be long until I can barely pick you up anymore. I only have a limited amount of time for you to be my baby. My actual teeny tiny little baby. Soon enough you'll start scooting around on the floor and crawling and it will all progress from there. I won't be able to protect you from everything. Soon enough your feet will be bigger than my hands, and you wont explore my face with your hands anymore. Soon enough you'll be too busy getting into everything else that you won't stare into my eyes anymore and smile when I give you kisses. Soon enough, mommy won't be the only thing that amazes you. You'll get into things and you'll learn the lay of the land and you'll be my big boy. My big baby. Sometimes even now you seem annoyed with my kisses, almost like you're saying, "back off mommy! I'm a big boy now!" You'll learn to talk, and walk and live and I won't be able to shelter you from everything. You will get bumps and bruises and you will cry and maybe my touch and hugs wont be enough to soothe you. Someone will break your heart one day and I won't be able to mend it. Just know now that I love you. You can be whatever you want to be. You can love whoever you want to love and I will stand by your side regardless. If you want to be a football player or a ballerina I will be in your corner and never stop cheering you on. Even now as you are looking into my eyes when I'm typing this I see big things for your future. You smile at me as I type those words and I know it's true. You can be whatever you want to be, little guy. Mommy will be there with you every step of the way. Just stop growing so fast, please. I want to snuggle you for a long time. I always want you to look up at me and stare. I always want you to fit perfectly in the crook of my neck, but those days are fading fast.

I love you more than everything. That is ONE thing that will never change.

Love,

Your mother.